Just to be clear, the term ‘relaxation’ in the context of this article means to be free of stress associated with negative thoughts.
This is only one of a series of posts on this subject because negative stress or stress of any kind if it is constant, is absolutely horrible for your health.
What is your river like?
Think of life as a river with some areas of rapids and some of easy flowing water. Is your river full of dangerous rapids that keep you in a steady state of fear and anxiety? The goal is to stay in the smooth water most of the time and thus make you better able to deal with the rapids when they come along and they will come along. What will follow is a very effective technique I learned years ago that will change your life forever.
Know your thoughts
The first and only step in the process is to be aware of your thoughts. Most stress is a result of what goes on above the bridge of your nose, what you think. Your job is not to try and change your thinking. That doesn’t work. In fact, that adds more stress. You have one simple job.
Listen to yourself think
Starting right now be aware of every thought you have. Listen to yourself think. Don’t try and change the thought or quickly divert yourself from it, simply listen. Be aware of subtle changes in your body because of the thought. Notice any mood changes the thought brings about. Is the thought a negative thought such as ‘there’s never a parking place when I need one,’ ‘my boss is a jerk,’ ‘why can’t I ever get good service.’
Listen to any thoughts that begin with ‘I hate …,’ ‘I can’t…’ or similar negative words.
Do not condemn yourself or judge yourself in any way. This is totally counterproductive. Your thoughts are what they are right now, but that will change very soon. Have patience with yourself. Years have gone into creating your thought habits and those habits aren’t going to change overnight.
Awareness will bring change
You will probably be amazed at how many times a day those negative thoughts pop into your head. That’s okay because the very fact that you are aware of the thoughts will bring about change.
There’s a part of you that is very wise, but when your ego is allowed to be in control, the wise part of you is suppressed behind the scenes. By allowing the part of you that is full of wisdom to listen to that out of control, childish ego rant on, it will slowly take control of the situation and the negative thoughts will disappear automatically.
The only part of this process that takes work is being consistent. You will probably be very tired at the end of a day doing this, but the rewards are enormous so, keep at it. You will be amazed at the results.
If you follow this simple exercise, you will have more fun, be more relaxed and learn to enjoy life to the fullest.
Now go have fun and relax